A Taste Inside My Head: Maddy's Journal

Lover Avenged (Book 7 of the Black Dagger Brotherhood)

2010-02-16T05:34:00.000-08:00

Lover Avenged by J.R. Ward

My rating: 5 of 5 stars
Whoa.

...Whoa.

This was every shade of BOSS! Lover Awakened is currently my most favorite out of the saga but this book totally booty bumped Lover Eternal down to number 3 and it's fighting for number 1 spot! WOW! The Warden has outdone herself, VERILY.

Most romance is covered in this book and for that I am glad. The Reverend is the type that you become very annoyed with at first but he slowly wins you over with each book and this book just takes to cake for him all together. Rehv is not a brother but be just as good as one, trust me on that. This is a man--er, male who feels apathy rules his heart and in his own way, he's sort of like Z in his blood slave days, EXCEPT Z did not have a choice. Rehv has choices, but he doesn't take them because he's afraid what the consequences could mean for those around him. That is when you slowly learn that he's not the big, raging asshole he thinks himself to be but behind his dirty deeds, the root is always for other people and not just himself. Rehvenge is a real male of worth. A guy who hasn't had a fair life because of his being forced to live surreptitiously in the world of discrimination and hatred who truly deserves a taste of the power of love. And boy does he get it!

Wrath is another focus on the book. I hate didn't read Father Mine before I read this book, I felt like I was missing out something but the Insider's Guide was on it way and the book was getting good just 2/4 through: No way was I stopping. The details are small, though. The Warden give refresher that are easy to follow.

What I am about to say on Wrath's behalf is a major SPOILER, so don't say I didn't warn you twice.

I have only two major fears that I'm aware of: That is going blind, and any eight legged bastard. The book contained spiders, a bit of them, so it's safe to say, I was cringing endlessly during those parts but I digress.

Going blind overrides the spiders for me. It's actually so bad to the point of paranoia, and I'm paranoid enough. If my vision gets blurry in the slightest for a long period, I really freak out. Wrath's sight reaches a critical point. When the crisis rises, I started praying out loud, "God, please do not make him lose his sight" and what do ya know, folks....

This broke my heart--not in disappointment--I wanted to break down and cry. When he goes into how he's feeling when it first happened, you ache with him.

Or maybe, I just ached.

Because when a blind person comes to my mind, I automatically put myself in their shoes. I imagine the color black becoming my best friend for the rest of my life and I think about how we can take the manifestation of beauty and life all around us for granted but most of all, what really gets me, is the darkness. I imagine that it would be like drowning in pool of black water with no dot of light for me to swim up to for safety. That's probably the pessimist in me but that's just how I feel. But every time a blind person comes to mind or in my presence, they automatically have my utmost respect because I know I couldn't do it. If you're anything like me, your respect for this man will swell to brand new heights. Fuck it, Wrath is a man--the true definition, all virile. I don't wanna spoil anymore else, but by the end of the book, you'll be ready to bow down to king, yourself.

John Matthew goes through a moody period that enough to make you wish for the opportunity to pimp slap him silly. As you all know Tohr comes back but after an insignificant disappearance in this book, John just throws in the towel. On everyone. At first, you can really understand what would cause him to give up like this. I was in his corner, willing to take a Ali blow for him right until the aftermath of a certain part with him and Xhex. THEN I was ready to get one those wooden canes they use in the Middle East to spank naughty crime-doers and beat him with it like he stole the Mona Lisa. It was ridiculous, this downward spiral he took. You become utterly frustrated with this boy, believe me, you REALLY will. I don't see how you can't. John was more of a man when he was his scrawny self in the earlier books, but in Lover Avenged, it's like everything went backwards: From male of worth to screw-the-world-irrational-teenager. And you can't help but think of him that way.

OH! And there is a bit with Payne! It's small, but I'm in love already! Ever since I've learned of her existence in Lover Unbound, I've been itching for more information. It's not much, but I'll take that I can get. There's word she will be getting her own book in two years (2011) and I'm already pumped for that.

All in all, Lover Avenged is a two thumbs and two big toes up! It'll really get you good and ready for Lover Mine, just like Lover Eternal did for Lover Awakened. Can't wait.

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Lover Enshrined by J.R. Ward (Book 6 of the Black Dagger Brotherhood)

2010-02-16T05:28:00.000-08:00

Lover Enshrined by J.R. Ward

My rating: 5 of 5 stars
I don't think this should really be categorized as romance.

But action/suspense/war/drama! But hardly enough coverage on the romance. There was about as much romance in this book as there was in Charlaine Harris' "Dead Until Dark" and that's not all that much. But the difference is when romance is discussed in this book, MAN, is it steamy as hell! Cormia and Phury really do have chemistry off the charts and maybe that was the point the Warden was trying to make. That their chemistry is so good that not much should be covered? I don't know. But this book is for my fellow action junkies and people who loves revolutionary stuff, which is why I gave this book five stars.

This book started out REALLY slow. If it wasn't enough of a chore to get through Cormia and Phury's POVs in Lover Unbound, I expected it to be so in this book and it kinda was in the beginning. Phury is one of those characters who can't help but love but he'll piss you off a lot because of the decisions he makes and I think that's the point. He someone who wants to do go and be everyone's hero but while he sets flowers on side, he pollutes the flowers on the other.

Turns out for five months, Cormia has been a sitting duck, unknowingly discovering things about herself. Meanwhile, Phury is smoking up a storm (literally) and turns out he has an inner demon than hinders him from making something out of himself. I can empathize with Phury here. We all have that inner voice of doubt in our minds that can stop us from taking potentially good risks or just doing well, but Phury's demon of doubt is so strong that it is ruining his life, royally, bit by bit, and this story is the tale of his complete breakdown, the straw that finally broke the camel's back and how he will rise up. And I just want to say that it's inspirational as hell, his story.

The rest, or must I say the most of the book, is all about the war between the lessers and vamps reaching a very critical point because as the brilliant Jack Nicholson in the Departed said, "There's a rat in my crew"---that's just a hint. It comes to a point where it gets unbelievably depressing. You see this traitor using all his prior inside information of the vampire community to slowly eradicate the civilization and you begin to feel really hopeless. I haven't screamed at a book this much since "The Darkest Pleasure" by Gena Showalter. You root so hard for this evil to be revealed at ANY time and for possibly some clandestine group of warriors that no one knows about will come out of no where and join in with good guys. You won't care where they came from, just as long as they come! This book, it's like Spartans vs the Persians, a small number of strong warriors against a a large, still growing, number of evil (who fight better with corruption and dirtiness)

I also fell in love with Blay, the big sweetheart he is, and Qhuinn, the hilarious sexpot who comes from a very fudged up family. We only get Qhuinn's POVs but lemme tell you, his story and background made my chest ache something fierce and things that are yet to come for this guy. Q is a glymera offspring and because of his defect, he's completely alienated by his entire family and the group of vampires. That was what solidified my hatred for this class. I have never seen such stupid group of vampires, they all deserved to die in my bias and harsh opinion. In our world, they're the Bush folk, as I call 'em. Loaded, but ignorant as hell, and they see everything in black and white. Makes me wanna spit.

This is the first book I've read, when I didn't know how it was going to play out. Yeah, yeah, the whole romantic H-E-A ending but like I said, that wasn't really a major part of the story, even if it was intended to be. POV's changed a lot, more lesser POVs--but I'm not upset about this one because this lesser was very interesting--there was a very big twist and surprise as well although or at least that's what they call it. I wasn't all that surprised, and I don't think you would be either because it makes so much sense. You will get pissed off that no one is using their real deductive skills, or not looking farther into what they're actually seeing and therefore they're still blindly chasing something they had the tools to figure out all along. THAT is what teed me off about the book, but the rest of it was GREAT.

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Lover Unbound by J.R. Ward (Book 5 of the Black Dagger Brotherhood)

2010-02-16T04:47:00.000-08:00

Lover Unbound by J.R. Ward

My rating: 5 of 5 stars
This book made my chest ache.

Lover Unbound is probably the darkest book I have ever read of the BDB series. I still have to see about Lover Enshrined and Lover Avenged but I would be shocked if it got any somber than this book. But I give this book five stars because like the rest of the books, it still managed rock my world and turn me in, turn me out!

It's not always dark, the mood, there are fun parts as well when the Vishous and Jane romance gets started. You really start to love the two of them together, they really are a perfect fit. Like in Lover Revealed, its not the same, but the compatibility is off the charts fabulous and let me just say bathroom scene! Oh.My.God. If you could pass out while reading...can you?

You fall in love with Jane. Even if you're not a Vishous person, can't help but love Jane! That broad is fierce! Fiery chicks makes the world round in a interesting way, and Lady Jane is mos def a tough cookie that doesn't take shit from anybody!

Now, I wasn't really a Phury girl because he bored me in the previous books. Cormia bores me as well, there were times when I was tempted skim over her parts but didn't. But Phury won me over like a damsel in distress in this book because one thing I can say about Phury is not just in this book, but in the entire series, the brother I have the most respect for if no body else. This man is noble, noble,. Makes a woman wanna shout! The sexiest, most desirable and attractive thing on a man is loyalty because it's what makes him a male of worth. Phury's got the most of that out everybody, it's not even about how he looks. The bastard is demigod on that one characteristic alone, a true diamond in the rough. Like his twin, Zsadist.

It's hard not ache for the guy, truth be told, aside from V, he's the other dark mood in the book. Chronicles of a loyal male who's madly in love with his twin's shellan. Always, that must be misery but with these terms--a bonded vamp who makes a human in love look like flimsy paper towel in a California park with the Santa Ana winds--you can't help but ache for the poor guy more.
Which brings me back to his nobility and that's not even half of it, you'll see if you read Lover Unbound.

I may be unbelievably retarded for thinking this way but sue me. I really loved the little "Who shot JR?" theme in the book. As you all know, V gets shot and the whole time it's kind of a mystery. They write it off as a lesser being the culprit, but you kind of know better. There are no lesser POVs in this book (Thank GOD) and sometimes that would be a tip off if the lesser was the failed perpetrator (i.e. Dark Lover). So you're kinda of wondering the whole time "whodunit?" and let me just say, you will never--well you mystery readers probably will--guess who dun it.

What I love about The Warden's books is the romance is not the only interesting things in them. The stories are bound to keep you on your toes as well, and what the BDB series has become to me is a collection of tales not only about love but nobility, pain, morals, etc. It's not all smut and that makes me feel better *blush*

Lover Unbound = badassery! 5 STARS!

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Lover Awakened by J.R. Ward (Book 3 of the Black Dagger Brotherhood)

2010-02-16T04:45:00.000-08:00

Lover Awakened by J.R. Ward

My rating: 5 of 5 stars
This is the best book I've ever read and I'm quite positive the more books i read, this will still remain as my most favorite book. Ever.

Ruined, not broken. BLAH-HAH! I think not! This lover is truly awakened!

Where do I begin? From the very first page I was like "Oh, CRAP!" and it didn't stop there. The tension and suspense just kept rising and rising.
Since the beginning of the book, I was slightly annoyed with the lesser POVs (especially Mr. X, how I hated that lesser...) but NOT this time. Mr. O is a sick ass bastard and there's really no other way to describe him. I like crazies. They entertain the mess of me and he'll do the same for you.

What really hypnotized me in the story was, of course the main topic, Z and Bella's story. You'll understand what the fuss is about over this book. You really will. (Inside joke alert, teehee!). It is like you're watching the epitome of misery take a new path on the road to freedom. Zsadist goes from being this scary--and I mean put the fear of Jesus in you scary-- dark member of the figure that actually makes you cringe just from reading to being a reborn and anew warrior.
Watching that kind of progress is extraordinary. Just thinking about his growth as a person brings tears to my eyes. To make you sympathize with him more you get flashback of his God-awful past that really breaks your heart.

The love between Z and his brother, Phury, and Z and Bella is so strong and unlike anything I've ever heard of. I actually cried and it's very hard to make me cry. The novel sort of gives a person hope, like the power of love is nothing to undermine ever or true love really does conquer all, past and present.

I thought first two were good but after reading this, DAMN. This woman is a Goddess of literature, true.

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Lover Eternal by J.R. Ward (Book #2 of the Black Dagger Brotherhood)

2010-02-16T04:44:00.001-08:00

Lover Eternal by J.R. Ward

My rating: 5 of 5 stars
Oh my God, it's just keeps getting better and better.

Ok. I just finished and I just want to say that it's is extremely hard to make me cry but near the end of this book, I came very VERY close. From the first book I've always been so-so about Rhage but in this book, I just fall completely in love with warrior.

I'm not gonna say anything about J.R's writing because it is what it is: fun, easy to understand and witty. The book is intelligent really. I never unimpressed with way how she took folklore, put her own spin on it and slapped into reality and made it all so believable and realistic. Kudos to J.R. Ward for keeping it real with fantasy for all of us! SCORE!

The romance alone had me wanting to pass out and the passion and the bonding is extraordinary. Mary is a wonderful character with courage and strength you can't beat with a spike laced steel pipe. Seriously, this girl is boss. But I won't lie when I say that there were moments when she frustrated holy bejesus out of me. One thins I noticed with Rhage--and I noticed this with the first book as well, is that he isn't the typical playboy archetype. One who thoroughly enjoys his conquests, gets a thrill out of it or some sort of self satisfaction. From the very moment you learn about him, you can't really believe that that's that's the life he wants to lead. In the beginning of this book, you can also sort of get the feeling that he could really care about getting some or whatever, You just don't feel like he really enjoys it, he's just doing what he feels he has to and it's pretty much implied. That way, I guess you can sympathize with the warrior more. It's confirmed when he meets Mary and he doesn't even fight his growing feelings for her. He's a fun, bubbly warrior, the source of life within the brotherhood, but watching him fall in love is a real treat. A true delight.

The ending wasn't too predictable. Just when you think you know what's gonna happen in the end, you hit that point in the book when you say "Oh, $%@!. How is this gonna turn out?" and then the pangy ache in your chest starts to build.

This whole book--to me--is about her finding faith again and rising above her insecurities brought on by her hardships through true love and Rhage finally experiencing something he's been longing for a long long time, no matter the cost or fight. In many ways, this story was levels of better than Wrath and Beth.

I read it in 4 days, I'm moving onto the next book, Lover Awakened and I freaking can't wait!

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Dark Lover by JR. Ward (Book 1 of the Black Dagger Brotherhood)

2010-01-27T17:32:00.000-08:00

So I've recently become obsessed with The Black Dagger Brotherhood books with absolutely zero remorse a few months ago and I figure, I should post up my reviews of them from Goodreads.com (LOVE that site) in honor of the upcoming book Lover Mine (Which isn't coming out until April--who cares)

Dark Lover by J.R. Ward

My rating: 5 of 5 stars
Epic.
That's all I have to say about this novel. I'm gonna make this a short review.

When I first started to read it, I was a bit thrown off. Probably because J.R. is so creative she created a whole new idea to the word 'vampire' that there were terms that I didn't know, I was slightly confused by all the POV changes but I quickly got over that.

The books can be read individually but don't because of the reason above. I tried bypassing books 1 and 2, and get straight to 3 (because I heard it was so good) but I couldn't get pass the second page because I didn't know what the flip was going on and I really wanted to enjoy the book so I went on and shelled some skins on the first two, best decision I ever made. So, I recommend that you read them--in order, front first to last. That way you can get use to the whole universe and won't find yourself constantly asking, "Wait. What???". It seriously kills the whole experience.

What I loved about this book is that J.R. Ward doesn't waste anytime, the romance is not too sappy, her wording and dialogue is so much fun to read, and everything she puts in this book is important. There are no fillers or any that crap, every words serves a purpose. The characters are VERY easy to fall in love with, this is a fantastic bunch she came up with.

And the Brothers...Oh, my God....scorchin' is an understatement.

Someone recommended this book to me and told me once I get started, it'll be like I'm on crack. I can't even deny it, I'm a junkie now. I'm telling you, as soon as I finished, AS SOON, I set out to go get "Lover Eternal", when my local Barnes and Nobles didn't have it (And get this: they had all the other books but not that one), I drove 30 minutes out of town to another bookstore and bought it (My guess is that not a lot of people read where I'm from because, we only have that Barnes and nobles). This was yesterday, and I'm already almost halfway through the book. I bought Lover Awakened in advance.

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OMG yesterday was miserable.

2009-10-09T04:36:00.000-07:00

My Reading teacher decided to fail my lab that i worked hard on because I didn't go to a tutor. Everyone says the tutors suck anyway and I'm not on campus when the damned office is open. The specific tutor is open on those days that I'm freaking not there and close long before I can get there! She wouldn't let me explain of course but what the fuck ever, man, I'm just tired and I'll figure some shit out. It just irritated my day that's all.

Ok, I've already decided to learn how to ride a motorcycle, the Harley Davidson dealership near my house teachers (yaaaaay) and I'm going to learn how to sail because nautical activities make me hot. The prob I have now is convincing my mother to let me. Ever since the tongue piercing fiasco she's been Ice broad on my ass. I know, I'm a horrible child and I'll get what's coming to me but for now I wanna focus on this lovely story I am writing learning to do things that get me randy...tmi? yes? Sorry.

As for the story, self, it's coming right along. I got a whole chapter--well based off how I'm writing this, I got chapter 1, half of 2 and probably 11 and 12 done. I told you I'm not organizing this because it never works teeheehee.

Writing action as novel style is alot different from screenplay style. When I was 13, I wanted to be a screenwriter-slash-director move out to Hollywood become disgustingly famous and marry Trey Parker---that dream lived on to be 4 years---and I wrote a few movie scripts, which aren't really as bad in terms of story and I cringed to expect you know it's funny when you write something when you were young like that and when you read again when you're older you start thinking, wtf was wrong with me when I wrote this?? but this really wasn't all that bad...oh when i say wasn't all that bad in story I mean the idea not the dialouge

ANYWAYS different and a bit harder. In screenwriting you empahisize the action like if I were to say "Carlos punches Leo in the cheek" I say " Carlos PUNCHES Leo in the cheek" instead of just saying "Celeste jumps onto the roof top in slow motion" I would write "SLOW MOTION: Celeste JUMPS ONTO ROOFTOP" but minus the slow motion part and capitalization.

I'm sure I almost did that at least 20 times but didn't actually record it down. Old habits die hard I guess. BUT I CAN DO IT!

SUUUUEY! Song time!
I guess you can tell I really like Interpol and Third Eye Blind. Eff yes.

Nothing sets my skin on fire more than a man with a handsome mug and chest hair...

2009-10-04T16:22:00.000-07:00

I have a math test in 2 hours and I'm pretty I'm screwed. FUDGE!
Oh, well. Math has never been my thing. I don't know why I'm talking it because I'm trucking towards Communications.
Oh. Wait. Its a core subject and I'm only a freshman. Fudge, AGAIN!
Its my fault though. The first piece of self determination I ever find has to be something that doesn't cost money. Writing this story.
"But it's so much fun!" I say in a british voice. But that's just how it works, now, is it? Fun sticks, Work sucks, I say.
Meanwhile I am still not setting goals, I don't know when this shiggy will be done, and I don't know what I'm talking about.

Does anyone watch South Park? Remember the head evil 6th grader who loved bullying Stan, Kyle, Cartman and Kenny? Ed Westwick is sexy but he looks like him...

AWESOME! I'm not the only one who called that!!!!!!

see more Celeb Look-A-Likes

LOL! Niiiice....

I have a unhealthy obsession with this man.

He stole brain after Crank.

*~*

The art of Manliness is a very beautiful thing.

Hugh, I love yoooou....

I'm also a really big fanatic of the 'Happy trail'. Not to sound perverted, but it's one the greatest ideas to the male anatomy ever! It's like going down I-75 to Orlando, it'll take you the happiest place on Earth. Jake G. is one of my favorite examples *nods*

Donnie Do-me--I mean Darko was a fantastic film! *clears throat*

*~*

I don't know who this man is, nor do I care what his face looks like, but I think I may have found the potential father of my children.

I'd love to claim him....

Dear self, Day 1...well not really

2009-10-04T08:48:00.000-07:00

I think I'm gonna fail this math test I need to be studying for tomorrow.
But, crap, I need this story done! My memory is about as good a dull knife to a block of wood. And if i don't write the ideas down, I'll lose it then I'll cry.

Ok, reverse! reverse! I am working on a twilight fan fiction that came to me 2 weeks ago and it's ruining my life. Its the second thing I've ever written, seriously, and the only prolonged project I've ever started that I feel like I MUST finish. It is a mystery story and THAT'S ALL i'm gonna say. Why? Because it's a mystery! Muwhahaha!

One thing I've learned about me is that I have self discipline and determination the size of a fly. It even scurries around from place to place too! Now, I'm not liking college but I feel obligated to go because I hate living with my mother even though I'm young.

Tongues piercings are cool, I'm so glad I got this one. I don't care if she hates it.

So I decided to keep a little journal (this thing) of my experience through this foreign element, the whole world. Hopefully it'll keep me committed cause I got some serious issues in that department, I'm not even gonna lie about that. In the mean time, I'm gonna read other people's fan fics because they inspire me and post up little random tid bits in between. I'm gonna reveal the whole polt when I'm almost done (I'm not a fan of those chapter-week-stories)

Last night I wrote an outline. We'll see how that works out.
I'm in an unrequited relationship with organization. I love it but it wants nothing to do with me. So we have a Nikki and the Professor situation on our hands. Disarray loves to leech onto me though. Why, oh, why?

Writing in presnt tense is hard as fudge. I started to do just that but I got fustrated and learned I'm not the only one who doesn't think it's a day at the beach. So I'm going back to past.

Song time: